Marriage Renewal

Amy Rauch, PsyD

“Marriages should be like drivers’ licenses...they should have to be renewed every 7 years.” I heard that uttered exactly where you might expect....from a local favorite ‘regular’ in the bar at the Mexican restaurant I waitressed at during college. It stands in stark contrast to what most of us utter before God and family and friends.......... • “Till death do us part”....it rolls off our tongues so easily and we scoff at the idea of prenuptual agreements, as we are sure our love will last forever. But it doesn’t just last on its own. The freebie “in love” feeling (we can thank oxytocin for) lasts between 18 months and 3 years...and then we’re on our own! • Sue Johnson, in “Hold Me Tight,” encourages us to turn toward one another, instead of away, when things get tough. ENGAGE one another—bring your spouse your hurt and confusion and distress in the moment and allow them the opportunity to respond. Turn toward. And then tell them that you would renew your marriage license any day of the week. 😉